Guest post: Lessons learned after thirty years on the job

Eileen Stone, MDiv, BCC (Retired)

• Pursue a broad education. Do not limit yourself to your specialty too early in your preparation. It will give you an entry point with and an appreciation for the lives of far more people. Very few want to talk theology in the same way that seminarians typically do.
• In related manner, develop curiosity about a wide range of things – nature, history, physics, cars, art, culture, etc. It will make life interesting, challenging and satisfying.
• Cultivate activities and skills that enrich your life, support your health, and deepen your soul, be it building furniture or a computer, baking bread, hiking a trail, growing a garden.
• Develop and continue to build a critical body of knowledge and skill set relevant to your work. Learn how to manage a mass casualty, provide spiritual care for a complex medical patient and family at the bedside or within whatever setting you are serving, contribute to an ethics consultation, understand the religious and cultural uniqueness of the populations you serve, make a board presentation.
• Know what your work is and what is not. Do not boundary creep. Chaplains can be very guilty of this unless they are clear about their professional identity. You are not a psychologist that prays! You have a distinct, unique role. Live into it! It took me a few years to understand that it was a recognition of the importance of our work and a sign of respect to be called “Chaplain” by those I served alongside, even when they knew my name very well.
• Process difficult events or patient/family care interactions with a trusted colleague regularly. Compassion fatigue is real, and it will take its toll if you do not pay attention and take care of your need to process it.
• If you are fortunate enough to be able to hire other chaplains, hire the best people you can find. A strong team is a win all the way around. Look for colleagues whose strengths complement your own. After you have hired them, support their professional development, and give them credit when they do a good job. Publicly.
• Find ways to contribute to the profession. Serve on a certification committee, mentor someone preparing for their committee appearance, conduct or participate in research, encourage those who are exploring chaplaincy but tell them the truth about how hard it is.
• Cultivate strong working relationships with religious leaders and congregations in your community. Help them navigate the world that you work within. Respect their relationship with their congregants and support them in providing care for their people while in your setting. They can become your allies if budgets get tight and you multiply one another’s efforts for the benefit of the community.
• Be pro-active in connecting with leadership on all levels. Be prepared to demonstrate the value of what the profession brings in times of crisis – natural disasters, death of an employee, Covid-19, etc. Understand that when you do this well, it builds your credibility. It allows you to be courageous and use your voice when it is needed. Then, find your voice and use it!
• Cultivate agility and resilience. Change is a given and you will be constantly adjusting as circumstances in the industry, technology and administrators change. Read literature that follows and anticipates trends. Do not get too comfortable. The image of pitching a tent vs building a house may be relevant. When you can no longer manage this or find yourself complaining about it endlessly, it is time to do something else. Practicing those activities that you love away from work, helps!
• Have some fun every day. On the difficult days, or even through the difficult years, and there were many, our staff would tell you my mantra was “Remember, it’s all about the fun!”
• Have a Plan B! Our profession, like the world, is uncertain. But, if you have the opportunity to practice our craft over a career, the rewards are beyond description. It is great work and a wonderful life!

Was I consistently good at following all these suggestions? No. But looking back at thirty years in healthcare chaplaincy and forty-four in ministry, these are the essential lessons that I learned. I am grateful for the chance to share them with you!